All negative experiences in the world are manifested from a lack of love. That’s why bringing love to even the toughest situations is key to moving towards a positive outcome.
Sometimes, love is knowing when to stand up for yourself. You must know that you’re worthy of being treated kindly. There may be a chance to share feelings if there is honest communication and perhaps an opportunity to understand yourself and the other person more. A deeper love can form through conflict when forgiveness and compassion are present.
Other times the conflict is with yourself because you’ve done something that doesn’t align with your values. It’s a lot harder to run away from yourself, but we still do, perhaps by numbing the pain with a variety of addictions.
But what if it’s hard to forgive? When someone has hurt you and betrayed your trust, this can be a painful experience. I had these experiences repeatedly in my life until I started to love myself more. Through that I healed parts of my inner child that I thought were unlovable due to my abuse.
I started to value who I am, and I dropped having expectations of others. I used my experiences like an internal weather report, to see how much of my past I had cleared energetically.
Rather than blaming my betrayal experiences, I opted to communicate clear agreements to stop confusion. Teaching people how I like to be treated was easier when I began treating myself with respect first and foremost.
I took back responsibility for the only thing I could control – my reactions. Every time I told the story of betrayal or abuse, I would think to myself, that’s who I am, so I kept inviting it into my life to be shown another opportunity to react differently. When I started to understand the signs, I started to change direction quicker.
I see forgiveness as a must for me in any situation. Even if I will never see the person again, I forgive. Anytime I choose a path that isn’t loving, I forgive myself. By forgiving, you aren’t saying what has happened is okay. It’s about not carrying the burden of the experience in your heart or anywhere else in your body.
Experiences, however they are judged, create who we are. They are clues to our life’s purpose. When we release the mind’s judgment, accept the past, have forgiveness and give love to experiences that hurt us, it’s like magic – life will bring us connection rather than painful separation.
